I first started using EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) as a way to uncover my subconscious beliefs about financial abundance. I had heard that 80% of our decisions are made using our subconscious, so no matter how many self-help books I would read talking about prosperity consciousness, I was doomed to recreate the same financial scenario. So, I started “tapping” as they call it.

EFT is a meridian-based acupressure system. Its purpose is to release emotions and beliefs that are holding you back. EFT works by first identifying the emotions, thoughts and/or beliefs regarding an issue you would like to change. Then, as you verbalize them, you tap on specific points in your body. This process allows the emotional energy to shift and ultimately, be released. This is how EFT helped me release my “money issues.”

One of the first concepts I uncovered using EFT was that I felt comfortable staying at an income level that defined me as “middle class”. This was a safe spot to be, not too greedy and not too needy. Although my conscious belief is that I want to be abundant in all areas of my life, my subconscious was making sure that I maintained this financial homeostasis.

So, what does money and birth have to do with each other, you ask? Well, you may or may not be surprised to know that Finances are one of the top 3 reasons why people are afraid to have children. So then, you have this couple who thinks they cannot afford a baby and they find themselves expecting their first, second or even third baby. Not only is this couple worried about the pregnancy and the baby, but this underlying fear of not being able to provide for Baby lurks around the entire pregnancy. This is where EFT comes in.

Here are the major, most common concerns pregnant Moms have:
1. Fears on how to Transition into Motherhood
Feelings that Mom could express:
* “I am afraid I am not a good mother.“
* “I am worried that I am unprepared to have this baby.”
* “I am afraid of how this will change my relationship with my partner, and can we handle those changes? “
* “I am worried about losing my independence.”
* “I am worried that we cannot afford having a baby.”
* “I feel guilty that I won’t be able to stay home with my baby.”
2. Fears surrounding the birth process and baby’s well-being
Emotions that Mom could be feeling:
* “Will I be able to give birth?”
* “I am worried about the viability of the pregnancy and baby.”
* “I am worried that something I eat, breath or do could harm the baby.”
* “I am worried and stressed about labor, since I don’t know what to expect. “
* “I am worried and stressed because I feel unsupported by my partner.”
* “I am scared of the pain and of having the strength to push the baby.”
* “I am afraid of having a C-section or having narcotics administered.”
3. Mom could be having fears of re-creating past childbirth experiences
Mom could be influenced by other people’s experiences or own past experience, and could be feeling:
* “My mother and aunts had awful labor and births, so I feel that I will have a birth that is similar to theirs”
* “I am afraid of hospital protocol and doctors deciding how I birth this baby.”
Can you relate to any of these? It is quite common to feel this way. We don’t talk about it in our culture, but pregnancy can be a very uncertain time, and women are seldom honored for the courage that it takes to be a vessel of creation. We walk the line between Life and Death and this dance is seldom revered and respected.
The good news is that although these are all normal feelings, they do not have to control your pregnancy or influence your decisions. EFT can help you release, or at least quiet, those intense emotions that cause stress to your physical and emotional body.
So, let’s start releasing….
In EFT there are set up phrases. These phrases are meant to get you to identify and focus on the belief/emotion you intend to release. You use this set up phrase as you tap on the specific meridian points. You finish one round of the tapping and then you see what comes up for you. If another emotion, past memory, or another belief that makes you uncomfortable comes up, you use this as an indicator to begin another round of tapping using the new set up phrase. The set up phrase goes something like this: “Even though I __________(state fear/emotion/thought), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
A common set up phrase for expecting moms is, “Even though I am scared of what having a baby will do to my marriage (relationship), I deeply and completely love and accept myself”. To start tapping with this set up phrase, begin with the “Karate Chop” point (see diagram), and say 3 times as you tap, “Even though I am scared that having this baby will cause further stress on my relationship to my husband (partner), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Next, as you say a “reminder” phrase: “This fear,” tap on the Eye Brow point. Repeat the same reminder phrase as you tap on each of the points: Side of the Eye, Bottom of the Eye, Under the Nose, Chin, Collar Bone, Under the Arm, and end with Top of the head.
Take a deep breath, and take a minute to notice what comes up for you. It is very common for people to start yawning (a sign of releasing). Now, create a second set up phrase based on the feelings/thoughts that came up and repeat the steps above with the new phrase until you feel complete.
I love to end EFT sessions with a positive round to anchor the belief that you want to hold. This way you replace an old belief or emotion with a new, desired belief as you ground it in your physical body. Some examples of positive phrases are:
1. “Even though in the past I was afraid of how this baby would affect my marriage (relationship), I now know that the birth of this baby will help in healing my relationship”
2. “Even though (past fear), and I now choose to (what you desire)”, and
3. “ Even though in the past I felt anxious about the arrival of this baby, I know choose to be at peace and welcome this baby with open arms”.
When making your last round with the positive affirmation, tap on all the points, and end by taking a deep breath.
Similar to acupressure, EFT, seems to be involved in releasing endorphins. This makes you end the self-session with a sense of profound peace.
The point is to let it out. Let those emotions come out because they are there, whether you want to admit it or not. Give them their tantrum, and love yourself for your courage to face them. You may completely release the fear you are working with in one session, or it may take you longer to uncover the layers. If the same emotion comes up at a later time, start tapping and see what you discover with EFT.
To review:
1. Establish set up phrase using the limiting emotion or belief that you wish to release:
“Even though I feel _______(belief/emotion), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
2. Tap on the Karate Chop point, as you verbalize set-up phrase three times
3. Continue down each EFT point verbalizing the short reminder phrase, or whatever phrase comes up for you that allows you to go deeper with the feeling.
4. End with the top of the head.
5. Take a deep breath.
6. Identify what thought or emotion comes up next.
7. Start another round to go deeper in uncovering. Keep going until you feel complete. I would recommend at least two rounds.
8. End with a positive, empowering round to anchor your desired belief or emotion.
I had one Mom come to me for coaching, and although she had no idea what limiting beliefs were holding her back, she knew something was bothering her. It is great when you can have someone listen to your story and fish out the details that are affecting you. In her case, she was expecting her third baby. Although she had two past natural births, she felt a hesitation about this upcoming birth. As she talked about her past birth and what she was feeling, she brought up that her second birth “was so fast and almost violent”. We did several rounds of tapping on this subject. By the end of our session, she said, “ I know you have said that childbirth can be pleasurable, but not until this point did I really believe it; I am going to work on this possibility!” She had a beautiful water birth two months later, and had herself and her vision to thank for the willingness to open to a new gentle possibility.
Using EFT not only will help you feel peace, but the resonance of peace travels to your baby as well. Enjoy “Tapping”!

Asha Ramakrishna is a Spiritual Midwife, Reiki for Painless Childbirth ™ facilitator, Spiritual Counselor, Strategic Planner, and Molecular Biologist.
Asha can be reached at (617) 869-5000, or at ashaguz@yahoo.com
www.birthofyourlife.com (after Sept. 15th)